Feeling Content


Hi, guys welcome back! This post is going to be another random thought of mine (again) hahahaha.

Well, this is like a summary of every piece of things that happened to me a few months ago till today.
January, the starting point of 2019. I faced so many obstacles, shits, hard things in my life. Thesis examination, journal (an article of thesis), and many jobs that came once at a time! They came all together, like exactly in the same week! I felt really depressed yet proud of myself because I can pass it all. However, I didn’t have much time to relax, have fun, hang out with friends and family, I can say I was an anti-social because of those moments.

My career starting to grow, my university responsibility calling me out, my family wanting my time, my friends too, and deep down inside myself need me-time too…

I cried a lot, I easily lost my focus, one job calling me, another one needs me, the other job kept yelling at me. Deadline to deadline...

I was super stressful but I still didn’t realise that I need time, time to rest.

Laptop, late-night call, sales target, pressure, deadline, riding motorbike in rush, sleepless: all are my daily routine. I started to make coffee as my best friend… (whoever read my last post must know that I am a coffee enemy but since January 2019, coffee is my best friend)

September, October, November, December, January, February and March… Everything came across. Career and education, I got it all. I started my career earlier then people my age. I finished my education on time. I got many big companies calling me to work for them, not only the domestic company but international ones. I really Thank God for this!

Well, people might think this is cool, but no, this is not that cool. This is super stressful.

I feel lost, I don’t know what to achieve, I run for everything in front of me, not knowing what deep inside my heart wanted to be. I did everything, everything, tried everything. I started everything but never finish a thing. 

Lost my focus, never be in the present moment, always stuck in the past for what I have done wrong, daydreaming the future, hardly find what’s inside me.

This mid-March, the 22nd y.o me finally found the path.

To be okay for being not okay because nobody is perfect

To be able to say no for things that I cannot do, and things that I don’t want to do. 

To feeling content for having what I have now.

To enjoy the simplicity.

To not live in a rush.

This January, in Mongkok, a piece of advice from my best friend was …

It was not wrong to love somebody, but it is wrong when you put much expectation on it. So don’t stop yourself from loving, especially loving yourself because when you love yourself, that love sparks to other people too and it is beautiful…

Well, 7 months, 3 big cities, Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur and Singapore, they all taught me a lot of life and love…


Comments

Popular Posts